Have you ever reacted in anger because someone looked at you funny? If so, keep reading because I’m diving deep into my recent experience with this. We’ll explore how to stop taking things personally, how these moments offer choice points into conscious awareness and the importance of energetic boundaries.
Let’s dive in!
Reaction Mode
I was headed to ShopRite on a Sunday, thankfully without thinking about what I was about to walk into.
I wouldn’t normally choose to go on one of the busiest days. Yet, the day prior I forgot to put food away after lunch. Thankfully, I learned my lesson after the last time.
Initially, I felt a moment of anger towards myself. I quickly shifted out of self-judgement recognizing that I had been in a creative flow. I moved into acceptance.
And…
I trusted there was a reason.
Exactly like in my last piece with having to throw out food due to a power outage. Perhaps another reason as to why I didn’t write about it immediately after it happened. See how interconnected it all is through a particular lens?
So I’m at Shoprite, about to turn into an aisle when a man begins to exit. I hadn’t even turned my cart and yet he looked at me with such disdain.
Or at least, that’s how I perceived it.
As I entered the aisle, I quietly yet audibly said, WOW.
Through the observer, I saw myself reacting with anger.
Usually, this is an invitation to see what wound is being poked at, but this time was different.
Choosing Not to Absorb Another’s Energy
You see before leaving the house, I set the intention to ground into my energy and to not absorb anyone else’s.
Why? Because just the day prior, I realized I was absorbing energy and feeling overwhelmed at the transfer station because I wasn’t grounded. Coincidence, I think not!
As I dropped in, I immediately realized I was taking on his energy.
So right then and there in the frozen foods aisle, I intentionally chose to release it and moved on.
That would have been enough for me, but there is so much more friends!
Choosing the Higher Timeline
As I was exiting the aisle a man almost walked into my cart. He was super nice about it and we laughed.
As I looked up to continue on, I saw the man from before. He was exiting the aisle exactly opposite to me.
It was like holding both experiences simultaneously.
People talk about time line spits and this felt like an embodied snapshot.
Choosing the path of kindness and connection over separation and division.
It’s Not That Serious
What felt so divinely orchestrated was that people were blocking the path I’d usually take and so I took a detour around a display of marshmallows to be exactly where I needed to be for that moment to happen.
And the marshmallows? I see it as a fun reminder to not take it all so seriously and to move through life with the wonder of a child.
Don’t Take It Personally
Believe it or not friends, this lesson continued to unfold.
I don’t usually see the same people multiple times. So when I saw this man yet again about 5 minutes later, I took note.
He was standing at the entrance of an aisle that I was about to head into. I signaled for him to go, but he stood there looking around with zero recognition of who I was.
His look of disdain for me earlier was not personal at all.
In that moment, I saw how this man was giving me the gift of experiencing the spread of fear based separation.
I realized how I could have very easily adopted that energy and been in a pissy mood the whole time. Shoprite on a Sunday is certainly a prime environment to feed that beast!
Instead, I chose to be consciously aware.
So I didn’t take it personally.
Nor did I hold onto it with anger.
And thankfully, did not take it out on another or myself.
Collective Wound of Separation
I realized how so many of us are not conscious of how the energy of fear based division and separation spreads from interaction to interaction. With the invent of the internet and social media, it spreads like wildfire throughout the planet.
I’ve sat with this in terms of wound cycling.
This is a term I use for a pattern where we create a feedback loop of projecting our wounds onto one another.
While this is part of that same story, it’s a new lens to see it through. Yes as a wound, but a collective wound.
I felt gratitude for this experience in seeing how a moment with a stranger can quickly shift me right back into the energy of: me against another.
I saw and felt just how easily separation and division can spread through unconscious patterning. It’s something I understand at an intellectual level. And today I was being given a an opportunity to embody it.
Knowing When to Move On
Here’s where it got interesting…
The last time I saw him, I was about to walk past him, but my pineapple started hitting something hanging from the shelf.
Because I needed to address it, I never looked at him or made any sort of connection. My lesson with this man was over.
While one might see the pineapple incident as annoying or avoidance, I saw it as protection. I didn’t need to extend the lesson. An older version of me might have tried really hard to be nice and friendly and win him over, but that would be me trying to change him for the sake of my own ego.
I was being shown that you can have a moment and move on. There is no need to control it or hold on to it.
Yet another embodied experience of how we truly are in choice.
Compassion Mode
And I’ll end by saying this, I feel deep compassion for this man. I had noticed him in the produce aisle before our initial interaction and something felt off.
One could say I was reading his energy. A premonition of what he was about to teach me.
Another could say I was judging him. Thus, I needed this experience to shift out of it.
Which is “true” does’t matter. At the end of the day, either could have left me in a state of judgment.
Intentionally choosing to not hold onto the energy I felt after our encounter shifted every subsequent experience with him. Rather than moving deeper into separation, I moved deeper into understanding and compassion.
And in writing this I also can’t differentiate if I released his energy or my own. Maybe he brought up my own repressed anger. And thanks to him, I let it go.
And…
Any residual judgement towards myself for letting the food sit out too long was transmusted into gratitude. If I hadn’t, I might not have had this experience.
My Invitation To You
Friends, the next time someone gives you a dirty look, which is also such a funny phrase, no? Or you feel like you are absorbing another’s energy. If you’re judging yourself for a perceived mistake.
Take a beat and ask yourself…
Is this an opportunity to drop into the observer and heal an aspect of myself?
You might not get an answer right away. Simply starting to ask the question, shifts your perspective when you find yourself in an experience that feels hard.
It also helps to develop trust when those moments arise.
As the majority of my blogs from the last couple of years can attest to, its a game changer in this wild and wonder-filled ride that is life!
Until next time friends, stay curious!
You Might Enjoy
- Seeing Through New Eyes: The Energy of Rejection as a Spiritual Invitation
- Divine Timing On The Road: What A Reckless Driver Taught Me
- Transmuting Judgment: From Expectation to Compassion
- The Power of Choice: Part 1
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If these words serve you, let them fly.
If you teach from them, may they bloom again.
Credit is kind. Integrity is everything.
Blair is a registered dietitian, certified intuitive eating counselor, E-500 RYT and Reiki Master. She integrates spirituality with modern day science to help people heal and reclaim their relationship with their body and food.
Disclaimer:
These are my current musings. This content is intended for informational and inspirational purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the support of a qualified healthcare provider or mental health professional regarding any concerns or conditions.